Holy Shit, This Fucking Guy.

In Fan Submission, Recipes by Guest Poster0 Comments

“I was a foodie with a boring day job who figured he could run a restaurant.” BRUH.

This is Robert Maxwell. He recently published an essay on Toronto Life entitled “A Restaurant Ruined My Life.”

youtu.be

Maxwell, who had no experience in food or business (!!!), decided to open a restaurant and, well…it didn’t go as he’d envisioned it would. Because of course it didn’t!!!

Maxwell, who had no experience in food or business (!!!), decided to open a restaurant and, well...it didn't go as he'd envisioned it would. Because of course it didn't!!!

Without even reading a word, you can probably guess that the endeavor was a HUGE money pit — because all restaurants are, even for seasoned pros! So why Maxwell — who (spoiler alert!!!) begrudgingly did the bare minimum required to open his “dream” restaurant — thought he would be any different is beyond me.

youtube.com

First line of the dek and I'm already mad!!!!

NBC

Almost…called…911…from…peeling…potatoes…

RECURRING THEME ALERT!!!!

AND YET.

Largely. Symbolic.

Disney

WONDER WHY!!!!!!

BRUH.

THE PERFECT FIXER-UPPER!

Twitter: @gavinmemes

“Ha ha ha get a load of THESE clowns, amirite?”

(Like…even if you're writing a troll piece, editors matter!!!!)

Hulu

TBH, I'm about to start drinking lustily myself.

AMC

Debra, noooooo!

Please see #14 and rage all over again.

youtube.com

OF COURSE HE DIDN'T CARE.

Netflix

*breathes into a paper bag*

HOW INDEED. HOW. HOW. HOW DOES ONE EVER REALLY KNOW ANYTHING REALLY?

MTV

My kingdom for an essay from Dorothy's mother.

CEASE. AND. DESIST.

Bravo

Fox

STOP LIVING BEYOND YOUR MEANS!!!!!!

Just what the world needs: more YouTubers!

*throws phone into a volcano*

Twitter: @i

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