How To Dodge Questions About Your Significant Other as Taught By Prince Harry

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Someone figure out whatever Prince Harry is taking, or what guru he’s meditating with, or what forbidden fruit he keeps in his gilded fridge — because I need some of his bottled steely reserve. (As if us peasants could afford it, but still, I just need to know). I have never in my life heard someone be so perfectly calculating and in control when prodded about their private life. I’m over here accidentally butt tweeting screencaps of texts, and being way too nice to known frenemies after just one glass of wine, while Harry shuts down reporters like whatever this skunk thing did to those zebras.

Image: Giphy

Outside of a terse wrist slap released via an official statement from the Palace, Harry has not publically addressed his apparently highly contentious relationship with American actress Meghan Markle.

Kensignton Palace Tweet of official statement

Kensignton Palace Tweet of official statement

And that makes sense. He really shouldn’t have to, and people also…

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